Softening the Corners

Returning to Loving Presence

Recently I came across Freya Secrest’s beautiful words: softening, widening, immersing. Such a gorgeous choice of language. I may not be able to move directly into loving presence when I’m triggered, but I can soften around it. I can smooth the jagged edges and sharp corners of my reaction. I can widen my perspective and slowly immerse myself in loving presence until clarity returns.

Softening feels luxurious to me. When I soften, I exhale feeling safe and supported. Can I allow things to be gentle and loving, no matter what else is going on? Yes. Yes, I can. But it takes practice.

Sometimes taking pen to paper to practice softening is helpful. You can start with an inquiry such as ‘Where in my life could I soften a corner today? Keep in mind we aren’t asking for answers. We are asking so our brain goes out into the space of wonder rather than searching through the past. And while the brain is wandering around, you draw without thinking.

Start by sketching a few random lines across a page, letting them intersect and cross. At each sharp corner, you pause and gently round it into a curve. With each softening, you breathe, imagining you’re easing one of your own edges; an old reaction, a tightness, a place that feels rigid. Slowly, the page becomes flowing, connected, alive. You may even want to color it or add designs. And you, too, may feel softened.

What edge within you is asking to soften today?